creative places, creative spaces

It's so important to have a space to create in--a space to call my own that I can write, draw, and reflect on the past, decisions, reasons, and growth in my personal journey. Inspiration is often so hard to come by, or find in my own life and my own work.  The buzz of a text message interruption, the beep of the alarm clock that awakes me from a dream I can only have while nestled in my comforter and surrounded by my eight pillows atop the queen bed in the bedroom. 

The drawer filled with parts of ideas, epiphanies gone stale, and a passion put to temporary rest.  A pantry closet which houses memory books and chunks of my life that are so far behind me that no matter how much I organize them, and re-place them in some kind of order, doesn't change their existence.

No matter how much I agree with the idea that every past has shaped my present and future, and hand pick the good out of all the bad, the bad is still there.  And so, I take each piece, every part into my pocket, instead of on my sleeve where all can see it, and believe that out of the past couple of decades, I can tap into the creative space at my own pace and reflect--to continue on my journey.

integrity is never a sacrifice

Great opportunity often comes with great sacrifice.  We always hear about great success stories, and positive changes, but we don't always hear the whole story.  I mean, let's face it, how often do we actually believe we hear the whole story?  There's so much suffering and hardship...life isn't as black and white as what some claim it to be.  It isn't just the survival of the fittest, good and bad decisions, right and wrong choices.  We can easily feel regret and remorse, even if it immediately follows the decision made, but the most important part is learning the lesson.

Who would have thought that lessons are still out there to be learned after school is over?  I thought after the thousands of hours I put into school and learning over the years, not to mention the thousands of dollars spent on a college education, that the lessons were over and it was time to exemplify everything I learned all these years.

But, every day we grow and change.  And every day we have a little more knowledge than the one before, and a little stronger.  And although there is a lot of sacrifice involved, one thing never to be included is personal integrity.

and the rain stops

Last night, just as we were wrapping up in the last hour at my store, the rain began--drip, drip became a sprinkle, then the thunder overhead.  before the night was over, the raindrops became more frequent--we couldn't walk in-between them anymore as they caught up with our strides.  I fell asleep last night to the sound of rain hitting my windows and the wind carrying it across the rooftop.  None to my surprise, the rain carried on into the morning.  It wasn't until an hour ago that I noticed the rain stopped, and the sky overhead was blue and clear, and the sun was shining.

It's a reminder of all the cliches of hope: light at the end of the tunnel, sunshine after the storm, and a smile after the tears.  But it's because of those thoughts we have hope sprung out.