Today I went riding around Carlisle and decided I wanted to see Opossum Lake... little did I know that the lake no longer exists.  All that is left is a dry hole which already has brush grown in the place where water once dwelled.  If some part of Carlisle had to suffer, the city made the sacrifice of the lake rather than something else.

I almost wanted to mourn a little for a spot that used to make me feel so light... a spot where I could go and no one could bother me...

It must be the natural way of thinking... surrounded by people, and dream of solitude... or left alone, and feel the want of being surrounded by lots of people... it's never an enjoyment of current surroundings.

grass is greener on the other side, as always.

everything's a journey

Meeting and talking with so many people in my life, I reflect on it as such a long and wonderful journey.  We don't even realize how we touch the lives of others when we do, but I see how they touched my life, even for just a moment, they had a part in my experience.  I take the good with the bad and all wrapped up, it's me at the end of the line.  And when I turn around there is so much road left to travel, see, and experience.

No one said life would be easy or fair or just.  It's hard and challenging and unpredictable and keeps me on my toes all of the time.  I don't know what any day will bring or where my path will lead me.  It is a line of uncertainty into an abyss of the unknown, an unknown that is waiting for me to create, develop, and paint the picture that is my own.

Plans, goals, direction... as always--good to have.  I'm always prepared for something, but who can be prepared for the unexpected.  We can't expect the unexpected?  Walking on egg shells and a constant careful approach will drive the universe insane.  Or it's easier to think--push or be pushed.

Look past the obstacles and push through the challenges--of this writer's block.  Just break it.  Screaming helps, but it might not help if no one else is around to hear it happen.  What about the quintessential bitter-sweet moments that become so cherished that those are the memories that stick out in our minds and we remember first foremost and always.

If for nothing else, we should be on a journey to inspire ourselves because inspiration is so very very hard to find.  And in the midst of it all, maybe we will be the inspiration for someone else.

creating a page turner

I'm often so afraid to write because what I put down on paper or in my word document might not be a page turner.  I want to create something that will engage my reader no matter his or her age.  But of course, the worry of negative criticism--someone is always out to kill someone else's  dream. 

After living the last three years without writing one single thing, I have finally begun again.  I am in the midst of a short story about a girl dealing with change a little bit at a time... and.... I just submitted my first television show critique.  I won't find out for a while I'm sure if it's being accepted or rejected.   But I will have to remind myself that if it gets rejected not to be discouraged and to push a little harder.  After all, I'm a tad bit rusty since I haven't picked up a pen in glee to write in so long.  But I have to say, I missed it so much.

food for your thoughts

I was eight and my parents were beginning their separation, and their divorce.  My sister and I had the great luxury of attending private school.  Of course, since my parents were divorcing, my sister and I had to transfer into the public school system.  We didn't know what kind of a journey we were about to embark.  Of course things would be quite different.

We got a letter from my school welcoming us to the public school system and enclosed was a list of supplies we had to buy: paper, pencils, tissues, manilla construction paper, and other miscellaneous items.  This was only the beginning of the costs.

Then we found out that we had to pay for lunch every day and there weren't a lot of options.  Pizza, french fries, chicken nuggets, pasta, goulash, or weird creamy dishes that were unidentifiable.   Lunch wasn't something to look forward to, as it wasn't always appetizing.  These things haven't really changed for our youth today in the public school system.  Food for your thoughts as an outsider looking in to what children are consuming today.  A lot of kids don't have options on what to eat for lunch because they are in poverty and get reduced price lunches or free lunches which contain minimal nutritional value.

It really is heartbreaking to see what children are forced to eat, or some of them don't eat at all because it doesn't taste good or they can't figure out what is on their plate.

inspiration at a loss

Searching for my muse is so discouraging.  I backed off of writing for so long that I forgot how to tap into my imagination and thoughts.

Once upon a time, it would flow right out of my mind and onto the paper or the computer screen.

Even my last attempt at writing, which was a short story about a little girl who was about to be hit with a really big change in her life--bam, writer's block.  I don't know how to continue the story.  And before that, still in the midst of my children's book--half way through the journey, half way through the illustrations, and still no completed product.  The book is so difficult because I want it to be accepted in the elementary classrooms as well as in a child's home. 

And the beat goes on

Nothing is impossible

If you're chasing your dream, you're not running fast enough.


It never seems there is enough time in a day to do everything we want to do, or everything we need to do. So our chores and responsibilities tend to get pushed to the next day--as we go to work, as we fall asleep, and as we get more and more overwhelmed.

What does being a winner mean? Or can there be different meanings, as there are always multiple personal meanings to life, happiness, and strength and we push ourselves a little more each day so that we can finally have what we dream about so dearly.

We are always told to stress less and laugh more. Easier said than done, right? Although, nothing is impossible. We simply have to strive more... a little higher, a little deeper. No one else will have faith in you, if you don't. No one else is there to watch over us, take care of us, or to give us the advice that we would have needed before the mistake(s). Sometimes we have to learn for ourselves and teach ourselves the hard way.

Some parts will be easier than others, but we have to remember life in general is difficult. Enjoy the laughter, learn from the lessons, and good or bad, we take a piece of each with us always. Chase your dream, yes; but you should catch it too.

When a blockbuster night was personal

Walking the wall from beginning to end, and she couldn't find one movie to suit her needs. To cuddle up with a blanket on the sofa with a fire roaring and a plot that catches her full attention with a little thrill.

So maybe there haven't been any amazing stories transformed into movies this year. She walks through the aisles genre after genre searching for a title that will strike her fancy. Nothing. "Any good recommendations?" She picks up that great 80s classic movie Back to the Future and a pack of jujubees to seal the deal.

Please can I have this?

Walking through the cookie aisle, a little girl asks her daddy if she can get this box cookies and as he says no and she cries, he wonders how he's going to make his next mortgage payment.

It never really occurs to us about the financial turmoil people around us endure on a regular basis. The struggling, the heartbreak, the disappointment--as kids ask their parents for candy and gum, and they are told not to ruin their dinner. When in actuality they're watching every penny so they can make it for another month.

Remember when

"Bubble gum gum, bubble gum gum" -- my sister and I would be chanting as we ran down the hill to see who would be first to the swing set in our backyard. Asking Daddy when we get our turn to ride the tractor around the yard and help cut the grass. Exploring through the woods, and getting covered in fire ants--then realizing that we also had flying ants and would scream louder.

Playing house in the family room by using every single pillow between the couch and coffee table, and trying to claim the bigger part as our own.

A rubix cube would keep us busy for hours, and the magic 8 ball was the most amazing activity at a birthday party.

Going to a carnival on my birthday and dunking the principal into the water dunking machine. Revenge is always sweet, I don't care what you say.

Playing with legos, duplos, barbies, and building blocks in a room we never had to clean up.

Staying up late to watch I Love Lucy and Perry Mason with my sister... when I would sneak into her room at night because I knew she wasn't asleep.

Why do we always ask remember when? Is it because everything was so easy back then? When we cried, mommy was there to wipe the tears. When everything was simpler, easier, and better. When it was two o'clock in the morning and mommy would make a warm glass of milk to help me sleep.

Looking back shouldn't make us feel badly for not having those types of memories in the present, but should make us happy to reminisce and to see what we were, remind us who we are, and who we want to be.

I'm Jennifer, a "worn ballet shoe" who has sentiment, constant great fit, and always there to remind of a time past to remember.

In general people make new years' resolutions. They want to make promises to themselves and to the people they love. They want hope and commitment. They use special meaningful dates as a marker in their lives and have a major turning point. They say "this is the beginning" or "this is the new me!" But the truth is that nothing and no one can change overnight. Everything in life is a progression.

For me, this blog is my turning point--my commitment, my hope. It is a blend of everything that I am. It’s a small corner of my world which has the capacity for so much more. It’s a piece of the universe, and ever-expanding while I grow, journey, and change.